Sue Ryder

1/10/2013 Tuesday we met staff at Sue Ryder for the first time to look around Leckhampton Court.  We both wept uncontrollably as we sat in the foyer as the realisation of where this painful journey had bought us hit home - a tidal wave of sadness.  Together we would face the coming weeks.

8/10/13 Tuesday we had our second visit to Sue Ryder and met with Dr Paul Perkins to talk about Christine coming in for a couple of weeks - at the time she didn't want to go in. The following day Chris felt she was ready and I rang Paul to see if was still possible.  Thank you Paul for finding a bed the next day.

10/10/13 Thursday Christine and myself packed a small bag and drove to Sue Ryder Hospice. Initially this was for a short stay so that Christine's pain could be managed at home.  By Saturday Christine's health had dropped and Doctors spoke to us about the possibility that Chris would not be well enough to go home .  News that broke our hearts.  Within days Chris was pain free and comfortable and either William or myself would sleep in the chair by her side.

Prior to this, in late September and early October it was glorious weather and Christine and myself would often lie on the bed at home in the afternoon sun. I would read Longbourn by Jo Baker to Christine and she would rest her head on my chest or lie by my side. It was during one of these peaceful moments that Chris said 'If I was to go now that would be OK as I'm really quite happy now'.  She wasn't in pain and she knew what she thinking.  I cried and agreed with her and we held each other tightly as we wrestled with wanting to go and wanting to stay.

The weekend

7/10/2013 Gill, Iain and the kids popped down.  A lovely afternoon.

6/10/2013 Sunday we drove down to Bath to see William and drop off his bike. He wants to cycle to University to save money and keep fit.  An exhausting weekend for Chris.

5/10/2013 Saturday Anita and John came over, we ordered a take away curry and watched the video of Anita's successful book launch and Strictly.  We're very proud of Anita - she has written a fantastic book on financial advice for widows with profits going to Mary Stevens Hospice.

4/10/2013 Chris and myself went to pick a cheap road bike for me that we bought off Ebay.  The chap lived in Highnam woods in a small woodsmans shed. A precious memory.

1/10/2013 A meal at the Twelve Bells. Prawn Cocktail and Cappuccino for Chris and Steak for me.  In the afternoon we sorted out the paperwork for Chris's Blue Badge.  In the morning we went to Coombe Hill Nature Reserve, a very damp day. We walked hand in hand for about 100 yards.  Chris just wouldn't give up and wanted to do things even when in pain.

A busy weekend

30/9/2013 Went for a short walk around the park with Loz and the dogs - a lovely sunny afternoon.

29/9/2013 Sunday we popped into see Claire FT in the morning.  For lunch we had a meal at the Twelve Bells.  Chris is desperate to keep life normal and do things with me.
In the afternoon we went to Stroud to pick up a road bike for William we bought from Ebay. Chris came with me to try it out - it was lovely as it was something we did together for William.
Christine you are incredibly brave.  Love you always.

28/9/2013 Saturday Toby G came down to stay with Chris for the afternoon while I went for a throat checkup at Glos Royal. 

27/9/2013 On Friday we took a very short walk through the woods near the road up Birdlip Hill (the quarry area). I did a small sketch of the blue sky sparkling through the trees.  Although Chris was in pain and very tired it is still a lovely memory for me as it was the last walk in the woods we took together.  In the morning Chris had had a new type of Chemo and wanted a break from the onslaught of cancer treatment.

Jane and Richard

25/9/2013 We went to Curry's to select a new cooker as the grill on the one at home had stopped working and we do like our toast and bacon - a grill is a must.

24/9/2013 We drove up to the midlands to see mum and drop in to see Jane and Richard for tea.  It was great to see them all.  At mum's Chris talked to Jane about not being around to buy the first shoes for her grandchildren - Chris cried, Jane cried and we huddled together and shed bitter tears.  Crying was something Christine found hard to do, even though she wanted to cry. The disease as Christine said 'has taken so much from me'.  Chris really wanted to see Jane and Richard the trip was very important to her.

23/9/2013 We went to the Wholefood Supermarket and met Loz. We stopped and had a coffee and a cake - Chris had her favourite a Cappuccino.

Harvest Festival

22/9/2013 As we were feeling the need for company we popped down to Shurdington Church for the Harvest Thanksgiving.  Mike gave a lovely talk and gave us a hug afterwards. We followed this up with lunch at the Twelve Bells.  At the church when talking to people I rested my head on Christine's shoulder and cried - Chris lifted her arm and cradled my head and rested her hand on my hair to comfort me.  Something she did many times.

19/9/13 We were given the tragic news that Christine's tumour had come back and we were looking at maybe a couple of years and more Chemotherapy.   We were shocked and didn't know what to do so a Harvest Thanksgiving seemed like a good idea.

Moving

21/9/2013 We loaded the car up with William's stuff and drove to Bath on a lovely late summer afternoon.  After decanting mountains of bags we tidied the house a little. A number of items still need sorting by the landlord. Ross has been living without gas (hot water) for a week - cold showers agh!

20/9/2013 Went to Go Outdoors to get some larger clothes for Chris as she felt her tummy was getting bigger. Not an easy shop as Chris kept looking at the cheapest clothes and I wanted to get more expensive stuff - Chris always kept a track on spending trying to save money for me later.  True love.

19/9/2013 During the day Loz came over to see Chris - a great friend.

In the evening William and Tim had a quick blast over Leckhampton Hill on the bikes.  William over took his old dad and headed for home at speed. The last cycle ride before going back to university.

18/9/2013 Another shopping trip we all went to Dunelm to get final stuff for Williams flat. Mum and Dad picked foot mats and plates etc.

The flat in Bath

Moved some of Will's stuff into his new temporary home in Bath this evening.  Most of the repairs to the house have been done - it's looking good.  Met up with Ross his fellow house mate.